48-hour film project

My pastor entered a film-making competition and I got to be a part of it. Lots of fun. View the finished product here: Choose to Win.

Intern video

I had the privilege of working with 5 interns in Orlando this summer. This is their 10th and final week, and they made a video that you can watch on youtube. Enjoy!

High Tea in Pajamas

Ding-dong!

Dinner: cheese fondue

Dessert: chocolate fondue

 High tea time and sharing

 Sugar cubes!!!

mmm... cinnamon stick

and somehow, after all the tea & chocolate, I was able to sleep. Oh, wait, at 3 am.

If There's Anything Good in Me

I've been listening to this song a LOT lately:
It Must Be You (Moses), sung by Bart Millard

I'd like to look in the mirror without hiding my eyes
I'd like to see what You see, why You think I'm qualified
To speak for You, O God, Most High

Who hides a baby in the reeds of a river, until he's grown?
Gives him a stage and the strength to deliver his people home?
'Cause I'm tongue-tied, weak in the knees
Must be something you only see

If there's anything good
Anything that's good in me
Well, it must be You
Must be You
And if there's any part of my shaking heart
To see this journey through it must be You
Must be You
It must be You

Not gonna argue with fiery branches that speak my name
Not gonna start taking backward glances from where we came
'Cause tomorrow's holding our dreams
But today I'm here on my knees

O God of parting water, God of falling bread
If my words should falter, will You speak instead?
You must see something good
You must see something true
It must be You
It must be You

Jadon Lavik

Came across this song, "Surrender" tonight, sung by Jadon Lavik. I love his hymn renditions, but I had never seen any of his other stuff. I particularly like the last 2 lines of verse 3.

Another step on the path of confusion;
Troubled heart can't find it's melody
Held under by my nature's fall
Held up by this love for me 

Another day spent fighting motives
Trapped in all the pointless games
Tired of holding on to my guilt
I'm tired of feeling all this shame 

So here's all I have
Here's all I can give
I surrender it all to you
I give you everything I do
Let it be my joy tonight
My burden lifted high
I surrender it all to you 

Broken from the weight of choices
No more strength to hold my head
But helpless is right where you want me
And helpless is where I am free

The Fellowship of the Ring

After several months I finally finished this work of Tolkien's. I have no desire to read the other 2. But a couple quotes I noted from the book:

"Just a plain hobbit you look," said Bilbo [after dressing Frodo in his concealed armor]. "But there is more about you now than appears on the surface." (pg. 312) 

"...So Bill was going as the beast of burden, yet he was the only member of the Company that did not seem depressed." (314)

Once Upon a Time

I've been watching a show called "Once Upon a Time," a creative mix between fairy tales and the modern world. Last week I perked up at these lines:

"...her child is our only hope! ...the only one who can save us.... All we can do is have faith that one day the Savior will restore all that we have lost."

Well put. : )

Walking on Water––reflections

This story takes place after Jesus' disciples have been out on their own teaching and casting out demons, and after he finds out his cousin John has been beheaded. He tried to get away with his disciples to a quiet place for rest, but got interrupted by a huge crowd in the process, and allowed for it––he was moved by compassion when he saw them. After teaching them AND feeding all 5000 men (plus their families) off 5 loaves and 2 fish:

Immediately Jesus made his disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to Bethsaida while he dismissed the crowd.

He assertively sends away all distractions! He had tried to get away before, but now he gets rid of EVERYONE.

After leaving them, Jesus went up on a mountainside to pray.

Extra assurance of not getting interrupted? Sending everyone away wasn't enough? True solitude.

When evening came, the boat was in the middle of the lake and Jesus was alone on the land. He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them.

The disciples didn't have a clue that Jesus could see them struggling, but that made him no less aware of what was happening.

About the fourth watch of the night he went out to them, walking on the lake.

He didn't go immediately to them, but he DID go to them, after letting them struggle most of the night.

He was about to pass by them, but when they saw him walking on the lake, they thought he was a ghost. They cried out, because they all saw him and were terrified.

Then he went out to them in a way no human would have thought of, let alone could have done! So they freaked out when they saw him do something completely outside of their natural, expected world. What is my response when Jesus works outside of my world of experience? When he doesn't behave in the way I think he should? How great that he is not limited to my imagination!

Immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."

He makes himself known.

Then he climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down.

He entered into their struggle with them!!! What a great line! AND the struggle vanished. Wow.

They were completely amazed, for they had not understood about the loaves; their hearts were hardened.

Lord, help me to intentionally make time to be alone with you. Give me the grace to respond with compassion when my efforts are interrupted, and the wisdom to know how to assertively put away all distractions. May I trust, because of your character displayed in this story, that you see my struggles. Whether or not I see or feel you, may I believe that you DO see me and you ARE with me. Thank you for having tricks up your sleeve that are way beyond my wildest imagination. Show yourself to me in mighty ways. May my heart not be hardened when you do, but understand that it is you, and not be afraid.

Upcoming Women's Conference

This morning I registered for a women's conference and I want to encourage all women to go if you possibly can, especially if you live in/near Orlando. I am SO EXCITED. Check it out here. June 21-24.

Great speakers, varied topics, worship led by Keith & Kristyn Getty... Wow! I love their album "Awaken the Dawn."

(Re)-Learning

I'm learning to walk right. Literally. Starting last month I have been finding myself actually thinking about which side of the hall or stairwell I should be on before I run into people. For a full 8months back in the U.S. I was never conscious of walking on the "wrong" side in tight spaces unless I ran into someone. And it happened all the time! 10 months later, I am making a conscious effort to walk on the right side.
Maybe it will become unconscious at some point but apparently not yet––I bumped into someone again last week. Old habits die hard.

I loved playing with these flowers as a kid during Sunday School in Indonesia. We would make necklaces with them. Lots of thoughts of Indonesia lately, and how much it is a part of me. When I left last year, I knew I would want to come back eventually, and now Charis's engagement is pulling Indonesia quickly back into focus.

Dad's visit

Dad had his bi-annual meetings in the U.S. last week, so he was able to come spend a few days with me. With each family visit, I feel more and more settled. Dad was run-down from jetlag and a returning cold, but he was still able to make some vast, long-awaited improvements on the house. With both of us feeling poorly, that afforded us some nice down-time together.

The living room looks amazing, Dad! THANK YOU for all your hard work. You're wonderful.

Answered Prayer

Have you ever prayed for something for years and then suddenly got what you prayed for and didn't know how to handle it? After decades of praying for a godly man for my sister, God has answered all in a rush. Certainly to Him it is not rushed; He has been preparing things behind the scenes all this time, but we are suddenly getting to see His work for ourselves.

(photo taken December 2011––before ANY of this had begun)

In March, prompted by my dad through a friend, Cah began an email correspondence with Charis. Although they didn’t know each other well, they had known each other for 5 years, 3 of those years in Papua, where Charis taught grade one and Cah facilitated a Bible Translation project.

On April 4, Cah flew to Singapore to spend a week with my family with the express purpose of getting to know Charis better. Three days later they knew they wanted to marry each other. Their communication was open and uncomplicated, and they treasured what they saw in each other.

Wedding plans are in the making, but first on the agenda are the details of closing/redirecting their individual paths. Charis is in the process of resigning from her teaching job in Singapore and will be returning to Papua to join Cah in his ministry once they are married.

Now to Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us . . . (Eph3:20)

Easter morning in Singapore, moments after Cah announced to mom and dad and me (present on skype) that he and Charis had decided to get married!

Frick & Frack

My flatmate saw a post on facebook that someone had found 2 kittens needing a home. I dropped in to see them and couldn't walk away from their sweetness. Frick and Frack are inseparable.

If Frack drinks milk, Frick does, too.

If Frick takes a nap, Frack tops him off.

If Frick goes potty, Frack decides it's time for him, too.

If Frack plays in a box, Frick joins in the fun.

Frick shot 40 feet up a tree and Frack was right behind him. Getting down was not so easy. Ha ha!

We drink water together, too. So what?

Oh yes, we fight, too. But in the end, we're best buds.

Frick and Frack were the first names that came to mind, but I decided to name them Manis (Indonesian, meaning "Sweet) and Zanmi (Creole, meaning "Friend"). Then looked up Frick and Frack and decided to stick with those names.

Nothing Like Mom

The last couple months have been rough for me. I have been overwhelmed and emotionally fragile. My family decided I needed someone with me, so they put mom on a plane to come be with me from Singapore. It was MUCH needed.

Mom's presence and help around the house was a huge boost in getting more settled. While she was here, cool furniture arrived from Malaysia that they had shipped over, and we bought a sofa and loveseat from Salvation Army. Woohoo! By the time she left I was ready to make some decisions about the upcoming months. THANK YOU for coming, mom! And THANK YOU for sending her, Charis and Dad. You guys are the best family ever.

Psalms

These past 5 weeks my church has been going through some Psalms. Each week our pastor has given us assignments to respond with a psalm of our own mimicking the style of the one covered on Sunday and then post it on FB (if we want to) by Friday. It has been such a neat activity. Last week was Psalm 147. In the freshness of Vitri's passing away, this was mine:

Praise the LORD

who sets out the times and seasons––

for birth and death;

for weeping and laughing,

mourning and dancing,

silence and speaking.

Praise the LORD

who breathed HIS breath in us

and gave us LIFE;

who determines

the number of breaths we have in us;

who knows the number of our days

and the dust from which we came

and will return.

Praise your God, Sarahjoy,

the Great Three, yet One,

seamlessly dancing.

We're assembled in His likeness

and must have companions.

Rejoice in His supplying

of friends.

Praise the LORD

and sing a new song to the King

whose ways are not our own;

whose Kingdom belongs to

the poor in spirit;

to meek and to children;

those persecuted for righeousness;

those who lay down their life;

and die to self; and

those certain of things unseen.

Exalt the King

whose life revolved around

uneducated fishermen

unpopular and unfair tax collectors

untouchable sick

stonable prostitutes

the hopeless dead and

those with untamable, unclean spirits.

Praise the LORD all you people--

who turns sorrow into joy

and mourning to dancing

who uses trials to bring perseverance

and for perseverance gives the crown of life!

Praise the LORD.

"You Give and Take Away"

Not many minutes after opening a facebook message heralding wildly exciting pregnancy news from friends on the other side of the world, another message popped up on my screen: a skype chat with a crying face from another friend (green shirt). It was early Sunday afternoon for me, but for her it was 3 am Monday morning and she had just found out that our sweet friend, sister, and 36-year-old co-worker went home to Jesus a few hours earlier (blue shirt). I worked with these 2 girls the 7 months I lived in Jakarta.

Today was the first bout of rain we've had in a long time here. I stayed home from the office, drained from yesterday's news. The rain was a little bit of comfort, as if God were bringing sympathetic tears my way. It is SO HARD to be on the opposite side of the world from where all my friends are grieving.

The rain has stopped now but I can't seem to just yet. I wish so much that I could be in Jakarta with my friends! In my mind I keep shouting, "It can't be! It can't be!" Last night I wrote in my journal:

I can't believe it. I just can't believe it. It can't be true. I must have heard wrong. Misunderstood.... But Vitri's FB page confirms it. Oh my friends. 2 of your treasures are gone [last month another friend was killed in a motorcycle accident]. Your group is full of treasures. Strengthen them through these deaths, Lord. It's so hard to be left behind. For their sake it is wonderful and we wouldn't wish them back, away from your presence, but we long to be there, too. With You, with them. One day... What a glorious day it will be!

Kak Vitri, I can't wait to dance before the Throne with you and those whose lives you have touched. I praise the Lord that your pain is over, but in the meantime I ache!!! Love you, kak. You are missed. Hug Jesus for me.

No "Control+Z"

Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Just click 'undo,'" and then remember that that only works on the computer––not on real life?

Normally I drink out of a mug, regardless of the temperature of the drink. That way I can keep track of my drink and don't keep getting out glasses. I have been SO COLD today. So I just boiled some water on the stove to SIP on and warm my insides. I poured the boiling hot water into my mug, picked up a plate of food with it and started walking out of the kitchen. I had a fleeting thought of thirst,

accompanied by a temporary memory relapse that I was not carrying the normal room-temperature water in my mug. I took a gulp. And promptly spit it out on the floor. And dropped to my knees. And set my plate of food and mug on the floor. And in my mind was shouting to myself:

"Go back! Go back! Rewind! WHY did you do that???!!! Undo! Undo!"

But life has no "Control+Z".*

My mouth has been numb for the last 30 minutes, with a slight stinging sensation. Now I can feel a grand blister growing steadily on the roof of my mouth that feels buttery smooth to my tongue (as buttery smooth as my move). Recovery will not be fun. But I can't complain when I think of the spectrum of possible pains caused by stupidity and that this is at the top of my stunts. I don't care to ever top this one, but that is an unlikely reality.

*control + z is the keyboard shortcut for "undo"

Off to IL

Before flying to IL for Christmas, I got to see Rachel and be treated to Indian cuisine. YUMMY!!!

It was good to see grandma, even though she doesn't exactly know who we are.

A white Christmas! Ok, this was several days after Christmas, but it's the Christmas scene and we woke up to a blanket of snow the day before we left IL. Woohoo!